


shadows

by WattStalf



Series: Kinktober 2016 [28]
Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Anal Play, F/M, Gags, Kinktober 2016, Masturbation, Other, PWP, Shadow tentacles, Suspension, Tentacle Sex, Xenophilia, fucking seriously i dont know whats going on here, giving throat fucking a whole knew meaning if you know what i mean, hello darkness my old friend, i honestly dont know how to tag this, kind of I guess?, so all of this is a fantasy but oh god, where do i even start with this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-23 20:14:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8341231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WattStalf/pseuds/WattStalf
Summary: Lately, he's settled on a new favorite, and that is what he falls back on tonight, and he's quickly able to lose himself in it.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Day 28 of Kinktober is Xenophilia and even that is not enough to excuse this mess of a fic. Like. Sorry doesn't even begin to cover it. I don't know what this is or why I did it. I'm sorry I'm weeping the internet was a mistake and so am i  
> also i partially blame my friend, Not_You for this, because, despite knowing nothing of the characters she still helped me cultivate the idea and encouraged me to write it, and also I blame my fiance cos he never stops me even when he has the chance

He sits alone in his room, when nobody is home. It doesn't really matter that nobody's home, because his door locks and he's usually left alone anyway, but he's glad that he doesn't have to be quiet. The thought of Celty overhearing him is a little bit thrilling, but he doesn't actually know how she'll react, or if it will only push her further away from him, so Shinra doesn't want to risk that. Not yet, at least.

He takes a deep breath, unfastening his pants as he relaxes, really lets himself relax for the first time that day. Over time, his needs build up, and he's been so tense lately, so very tense and with no chance for proper release, but now he's home and she's working late. Now, he has the chance to think about her, and all that he wants from her but can't have, and when he calls her image to memory, it doesn't take long for him to get fully hard at all, straining against the fabric of his underwear.

For a moment, he just rubs himself over the fabric; he's a tease because he thinks she would be too, he thinks she has to be, after making him wait this long for his chance with her. He lets out a slow breath, and tips his head back, his eyes fluttering closed as he starts to fantasize. There have been so many fantasies, since before he even understood what the fantasies meant, and along the line, they got more and more extreme...more and more unusual, but he's never thought of _that_ as a bad thing. Really, it only makes sense.

Lately, he's settled on a new favorite, and that is what he falls back on tonight, and he's quickly able to lose himself in it. If he shuts out the rest of the world enough, he can almost pretend it's real. He can almost feel it. And he knows that it will likely remain a fantasy forever, but he doesn't mind that, and even if she never really wants this, he'll always have his imagination to rely on.

His fixation with her leads to a fixation with her lack of a head which leads to his fixation with her neck, with the empty space filled with shadows. He wants to fuck her there, because he thinks it will feel amazing. She's grabbing him with her shadows before, and he loves it, and he wants inside of her in as many ways as he can manage, and so Shinra thinks about fucking her neck. Finally, he frees his cock and wraps his hand around it, and strokes him while he pretends to be inside of her.

_It's strange, but pleasant, and even a little bit warm as shadows constrict around him inside of her neck. He thrusts in and she tightens around him, almost like his own hand, working up and down the length of his cock. Shinra moans happily, not minding the strangeness of this in the slightest. He wonders what will happen when he gets too close; he wonders if she will be okay with 'swallowing', or if she even can._

_Suddenly, he feels something behind him, and he's surprised to see Celty being so forward with him. Of course, he's wanted to as about this as well, and he's overjoyed to feel her taking the initiative. The shadow pushes inside of him with ease and begins to expand in him, slowly to give him time to stretch and to adjust. Celty's shadow expands to about the size of a finger, and then to the size of two, and it wriggles, hooking like fingers would._

_His breath catches in his throat as he tries to whimper her name, and he can feel the shadows expanding again. Three fingers, now, or maybe the size of a small toy, something like he bought for himself once to practice with, and that's why it doesn't hurt. He has something bigger, too, and he tells her this in a strained tone of voice so that she knows she can let the shadows expand again._

_While she's fucking him and while he's fucking her, she starts to push him out of her neck, a rope of shadow still wrapped around his cock. She's moving him, pushing him up, and he whines because he misses being inside of her, and a tendril of shadow clamps around his mouth. He's on his back in the air now, shadows wrapping around his wrists, around his ankles, suspending him above her. She's being_ incredibly _forward today, and he loves it, and even if he isn't inside of her, she's still inside of him._

_He wants her inside of him so terribly, and he opens his mouth to allow the shadows into his throat. It chokes him, but only a little, and he can still breathe slow, shaky breaths through his nose. She holds him tight, suspended over her as she fucks his ass and she fucks his throat- he barely even misses fucking hers now because this is all so_ nice _\- and strokes his cock. More tendrils of shadow wrap around his body, running over him and teasing him and touching him and he breathes her in, and for this moment, it really feels like they've managed to become one._

_If he could tell her how much he loved her right now, he would, but his mouth is too full and instead he gags around her shadows, making incoherent noises. If she pushes any deeper or if she expands her shadows at all, he'll throw up, he's sure, but she must know that because she doesn't do either of those things. He knows he's going to come soon, but he wants to hang onto this moment forever, he wants to never let go of this perfect moment when he has her and she has him and they are one._

_A few lines of saliva run down his chin from his failed attempts to speak, to tell her everything he wants to say, to let her know that he's almost there, to say that he loves having her inside of him in every way. His garbled words don't reach her, but when have they ever needed words and when will they ever need words? Everything is already perfect just as it is, and she is inside of him and all over his body, and he has everything he has ever wanted._

_She doesn't tell him she loves him, but he hears it anyway, and he's known for so long. Even when she tries to pretend, he's always known, because how could she not? He knows how it is supposed to be and he knows that he loves her, and that's all that he's ever needed to know. She's exactly what he needs, shaped exactly to the ideal woman that's always lingered in his mind. It's all ideal, all perfect, hardly real at all and he-_

He is brought back to reality when he comes, his head thrown back and her name on his lips, garbled by the hand in his mouth. She isn't there and she has never been, because the ideal is just an idea, and for now, it's still too perfect to be real. It isn't real yet, but in the moment of his climax, it doesn't sting quite as much to remember that. All in due time, anyway, he knows, and he's relaxing into bliss and that numbs everything else.

He knows how unrealistic his fantasy is. It's unlikely that she'd be willing to something that weird for him even after he's managed to get her to return his love, and even if she were willing, he isn't exactly sure how that would feel for her, or if it would even be completely possible. That doesn't bother him, though, because he thinks that if he could actually have her, then he wouldn't actually need anything that extreme to enjoy himself, that anything with her would be enough. It's only because he's starving for her that he's let his mind wander so far, into such strange territory. Isolation always does strange things to people.

When his breath has caught up to him, Shinra straightens up, knowing that he has to get himself cleaned up and his toy washed and hidden away for next time, but once he's in the shower, still tingling with bliss, he lets his mind wander once again. Isolate does strange things to people, and he can't wait until he's finally broken free of that.

 


End file.
